Sympathy

Jesus sympathizes with us (Hebrews 4:15). He feels the same things we do – if we’re sad, Jesus is sad. If we’re happy, he is happy. He shares in our emotional state. 

Jesus is able to sympathize with us because he took on our flesh (Hebrews 2:16-18). He went through what we did while he was upon the earth, and he faced the challenges common to all humanity. He got the victory over these challenges, and he never sinned or gave in to temptation. Therefore Jesus both knows the struggles we face as we are in the flesh, and he knows how to overcome these struggles.

When we face hard times, Jesus will comfort us. We can turn to him in prayer and tell him our troubles. We can find comfort in his word – especially the Psalms. After being comforted, we can encourage and comfort others with the comfort that we received from God (2 Corinthians 1:4).  

Sympathy Among God’s People

We are to be sympathetic like Jesus – “rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep” (Romans 12:15). In a Biblical church, if one member suffers then all members will suffer. If one member rejoices, then the others will rejoice (1 Corinthians 12:26). This will happen especially within a Christian community where believers are sharing things, for their lives are interconnected and they stand or fall together. The Christians who comprise the bride of Christ at the end of the age will be characterized by great love and sympathy for each other. 

Jesus Knew When to be Sympathetic 

When Lazarus died, Jesus wept (John 11:33-35). He cried out of sympathy for Lazarus’ family, not hopelessness in the face of death. Jesus was about to raise Lazarus from the dead, and knowing that Lazarus was about to be resurrected, Jesus could have been happy or excited. But instead Jesus was sad because he entered into the emotional state of the mourners.

Another time Jesus came to a house where a girl was dead, and the house was full of weeping and wailing people (Mark 5:39-40). However, this time Jesus did not enter into the mourners’ emotional state. Instead he rebuked them and told them not to cry. Jesus knew there was something wrong with their sad emotions, and this is apparent because after Jesus rebuked them, these people suddenly began laughing at him. They quickly changed their emotions. This is probably because their sorrow wasn’t genuine, and Jesus discerned this. Jesus threw them out of the house and then raised the girl from the dead. We need to be led by the Holy Spirit as we discern how to be sympathetic.

Lack of Sympathy

Sometimes a person needs sympathy but finds none. This world is often very unsympathetic. When there is no sympathy, it is like taking away someone’s coat in the cold weather (Proverbs 25:20). A person faces a problem but another person refuses to sympathize, then troubled person feels “out in the cold.” Lack of sympathy means there is a lack of human warmth. This leaves a person feeling unprotected and worse than before.

Without sympathy, it is like vinegar mixed with baking soda (Proverbs 25:20). There can be a violent reaction. It may spark an argument – “You just don’t understand!” “You just don’t get it!” 

When we face a lack of sympathy from others, we don’t need to have a violent reaction or suffer as if out in the cold. We can turn to God. He will sympathize with us.

Healthy Limits to Sympathy

As we seek to be sympathetic, it’s important to recognize that there are necessary limits on sympathy. Sometimes a person may have sinful emotions like bitterness, anger, jealousy, or hatred. We don’t enter into these emotions and share them, because that would be wrong. Instead, we try to help people come out of these sinful emotions.

At other times healthy emotions can be misapplied. For example, we are commanded to refrain from rejoicing when our enemy falls (Proverbs 24:17). Joy is good, but if someone is joyful about the destruction of their enemy, then that is sin. We should not enter into the emotional state of joy regarding this. Instead we should try to help others love and forgive their enemies.

Sometimes a person is in an unhealthy emotional state. For example, a person might be mired in a pit of depression and always be complaining. To help that person, we don’t need to climb into the pit with them and start wallowing in the mud. Instead we need to pull them out. We can encourage that person to trust in the Lord, recognize God’s goodness and power, and take steps to praise and thank God.

We are commanded to be sympathetic, following the example of Jesus. We will do this as we are led by the Holy Spirit. True sympathy is spiritual and comes from God. It begins in the spirit, not in the soul. It starts with God, not with ourselves. As God leads us, we can show divine sympathy to others. This will help others and comfort them. And it will cause us to be more conformed to the image of our sympathetic high priest Jesus Christ.